When falling in love, we all dream of living "happily ever after”’ but relationships are complicated and nobody’s safe from going through some heartache…
While passion, attraction and infatuation are all very good and all at first, the basis for any healthy, loving and long-lasting relationship are kindness, empathy, appreciation and caring, which must all be nurtured over time.
All couples are different, of course, and what might work for one, doesn’t necessarily work for the other. But all healthy relationships have a few things in common and there are some signs that indicate you’re in a healthy relationship that is really good for you.
So here are 10 signs you found a keeper:
You have fun together and laugh about the same things. You enjoy being in each other’s company not only on special occasions but also in the least exciting moments of your daily routine.
You both keep your own identity, giving space and allowing time for each one’s own interests, family and friends and doing what matters to each as individuals. You are a couple, not Siamese twins!
Same values and life goals are vital for a good long-term relationship. You don’t need to agree on each and every little thing but when it comes to important issues such as core values of life or whether to have children or not for example, if you do not have the same life goals, at least one of you will end up very frustrated and unhappy.
You do not keep secrets about either your past or your plans for the future and you can talk openly about anything. Honesty and frank communication are the keys. You don't hold things back even if that means you are going to argue, and when you do argue, you trust each other enough to feel stable and secure in the relationship, not having to worry whether it is going to end because of this argument. You also trust your partner’s commitment and feel that when the going gets tough, you won’t be left alone.
You inspire and support each other in wanting to grow and to become better persons not because your partner makes you feel you’re not good enough but because he/she brings out the best in you.
You support actively each other when facing challenges such as taking up a new sport, learning a new language or training for a marathon. It is very rewarding for the one facing the challenge and growing through it and also for the other who, like a cheerleader, boosts his partner’s courage and confidence.
You respect each other's opinions and differences and when you don’t agree on something, you do it lovingly and kindly, never screaming or calling names. Also, you both respect each other’s families and friends.
You have realistic expectations for the relationship instead of fantasizing about how it should be. You don’t base your relationship on the hope that your partner will change nor think that the relationship will become better when external circumstances such as work or house, change.
You view each other as equals. No one has more power than the other in the relationship. You both make decisions together, from the smallest things as where to hang a picture to really important decisions such as how many children you will have or how to spend the money you saved. When you don’t agree, you meet halfway, both making compromises.
You never take your partner or your relationship for granted, showing appreciation and being thankful for every nice gesture.
Last but not least, you must ask yourselves if both really want to be in a long-lasting relationship. If your answer is yes, then go for it. I mean, really go for it! Make a real and mature commitment to each other and work hard in order to achieve the healthy and amazing relationship you want. Staying together for the long haul is a decision you make and it is something that you want to do, not something that you think you should do.
And remember, although no relationship is perfect, it should make you feel happy and fulfilled more often than it doesn’t.
Photo via Pinterest